I suppose timing in life is everything. I guess I am waiting for the right time to tell my wife I am bisexual, ask my wife for a 3-some and what ever else I am waiting to do. It’s a good possibility this is part of a larger problem in my life.
Interestingly enough, I am the dominant personality in our relationship in general . I have always taken the lead in our sexual relations up until this ity bity turn of events. I agree with Erodoux I just would like to enjoy the benefit of my bisexuality with my wife. I really do not have a desire at this point to be with another woman. However I really need to be with another guy.
Maybe I am thinking too much? I seem to be spending a lot of time on all things bisexual lately. Is this a normal part of the process of coming out so to speak? I gotta go back to work….
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5 comments:
Thinking too much is certainly one of the most common things for guys like us in the place where you are. You can argue yourself into it and then out of it. You rationalize and question. And freak out and panic. And then get relaxed and accepting. It is very common for it to take over things when it's so top of mind and weighing on you. Think it's probably especially tough when you want to do something, but can't. I didn't make the choice to tell my wife exactly. She asked me and I told her everything.
Whatever you decide to do just be sure you've thought all the answers through. Like if she asks if you've been with guys. Be ready for questions and make sure you have the answers you want to give.
Hang in there man. You're not alone out there.
Hi guy,
This one caught me because it has not been all that long since I may have written it. At the end of Jaunuary 2006 over dinner in a restaurant rumor has it I said "I am bi-sexual". While I remember the whole evening I do not remember that specific moment. My wife does - clearly.
I am all for "coming out so to speak" (love the phrasing), I did it and would do it again in spite of everything.
But be aware that certain things can never be unsaid and at that point it starts to be about more than sex. the fantasies were in our bedroom for near twenty years and there were times they were awesome (as you and Mark have both experienced), but as we say around here, the genie can never be put back into the bottle.
One of my regrets is that I had not been blogging longer (in terms of the friends / advice givers I met, that I had not found any of the online or in person groups that I have now found and in general had not heard more of what others had experienced before my announcement.
Sorry for the long comment - might have e-mailed but do not have your address.
Hang in there and know one thing is clear - this IS a normal part of the process. Welcome to the ride.
Nate
You guys have been wonderful therapy for me so far. I realize I have a long road ahead.
hey
I'd really like to discuss this situation further. These words are really useful but I can't always risk looking at blogs on this subject, if you know what I mean.
Is is possible to discuss this via email?
BTW Thank you already. Good to know I'm not alone - either in searching CL or debating all this in my head!
sure just email me....
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