The long and winding road

I am new to this blogging stuff and just really here to say out loud what has been going on in my mind for a long time. I am a bi married male. I suppose I have known since I was a kid that I was attracted to males. I was always trying to sneak a peak at other naked guys. As I became sexually aware I realized that I would get aroused by these drive by peeks. As a teenager while I did look at hetero porn, I always was looking to get my hands on gay porn as well. As life went on I started to ignore these feelings and did the "right thing" and married my childhood sweetheart when I was 20 years old. I have been married to her for a long time and had two beautiful kids and a relatively happy life (still married to same woman). Early on in my marriage I started to have strong urges to continue looking at gay porn and did so. Finally one day in my early twenties I acted on the urge and hit one of the cruising spots. The rest is just history, I have been actively bi for the last 20 years being careful and discrete. As I have arrived at what is called middle age and still enjoying these encounters I often wonder if I took a different path, where would I be? I always tell myself that I am in it for the sexual satisfaction only. I still do enjoy sex with woman but need that male-to-male contact occasionally. The problem now is I need it more often. So things have changed! Well that's all for now gotta go back to my "normal life”.....